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Showing posts from May, 2020

Tears Speak For Me

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Today, I finally cried. After years of seeing black men murdered I finally cried. Why? Today, I felt justified. I felt like I had permission to feel what I have been experiencing. My classmates gave me the permission to sit in the emotions of Fear Uncertainty Discomfort Weariness Concern. I realized today I never stopped to ask my brothers, my dad, cousins or my nephew how they were doing. I have been afraid. I have been afraid to hear them tell me their pain, fear, and  rage. I have been afraid the truth of their reality would only confirm how powerless I am, how powerless we are regarding how people view us. I cried because I really had no words to express what my soul was experiencing. I felt for my classmates. Perhaps, many of us are sitting in the same seats of uncertainty and we are seeking together to understand. I had two conversations with friends this week. One cried. Another told me they cried because they were so hurt. Although I understood what they were

What Does your Silence Mean ?

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So, as an African American female employed at a PWA (predominately white agency) there is a loud silence that I simply cannot ignore. Daily I wonder, “Do you see me?“ “Is the pain I experience noticeable to you in any way?” “Is there any concern that maybe I am in emotional distress?” Then there is this Private rehearsal, “So if they ask, what am I going to say? How do I say it? What do I want them to do differently ? Am I being objective? “ Each day I have meetings online with colleagues that can see my face and I wonder are they aware or on any level Or conscious that possibly I am hurting. The silence is so confusing. Is it that your are uncomfortable? Are you unaware? I want you to know that I am hurting.  I am sad that I have to consider where I am going, before I go, and what I am wearing. I am concerned about the black men in my life that are fearful of their own lives. I was concerned about going to the office to print reports that I need to read becaus

Wind & Waves

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One could imagine working at home when you live alone has been a time of  peace, serenity and  relaxation. Truthfully, it has been that way up until a few weeks ago. One day, my washer began to flood my apartment. Soon after, the kitchen sink began to do the same. After a heated phone call with my leasing office a plumber resolved the issue within 24 hours. After an uneventful two weeks, while doing homework my power went out at my home. Interestingly enough, there was no power in the kitchen and living and dining areas. There was power in my room, bathroom, and office. Sooo what was a girl to do? Memorial Day early morning, I unpacked my fridge and freezer and hauled all the food to my sisters house. We agreed I could come over, eat, and hangout for as often as I need and for as long as I need. After 4 days of no AC and no fridge guess who had a visit from the electrician today? In the middle of this I also cut my finger washing dishes, got stitches and have since had them remov

$3.00 Was it Worth It?

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I have a confession. I paid $3.00, actually $2.99 for the Google Blogger App! Hope it doesn’t disappoint. Now I know you are wondering, “what’s with the pic ? “ To that I have one question. When was the last time you saw a $2 bill? Boy are they rare and pretty cool might I add.  This is my third blog and I am digging it so far. I found myself thinking ... if you spend three dollars today maybe after the class is over it will compel you to keep coming back. My intent, as I have shared before is to learn. But let me be honest, I want to use this blog to share, explore, learn, educate, create, and just have fun.  Some may say Tiffany, this post is here, there and everywhere. Your thoughts are a little unorganized. To that I say true. This is just me creating and exploring.  I’ll come back later to talk about class readings, drop a line or two about what I have learned from my classmates.  Happy reading.  Tiffany 

The perfect blog post

The perfect blog post does not exist. I’m stuck. I’m trying to figure out how to make my blog posts interesting, dynamic, and educational. Seems to me I’d rather make videos to share my experiences in this class. I just finish reading the assignments for this week and I am interested in seeing what new things I will learn. I recently had a conversation with an old classmate and he told me I was not technologically inclined. To that my response was, “I’m just traditional”. I suppose this blog is just about me exploring thoughts pertaining to how this class will shape my daily functioning and my use of tools to assist me in personal goals. I also need to up my game. You know it seems that it takes me a little longer to explore new things when my intent is to learn and master what I’ve learned. So typically that ends up leaving me a little mentally drained. However, I’m looking to allow this Experience to be fun and exciting. For now, signing off. Tiffany

Tried & True

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Today marks the first day of a journey I intend to take headfirst in order to learn everything I need to be successful in this class and also in life. I envision utilizing Twitter and this blog will help teach me to facilitate teaching adults through  utilizing technology and all the tools the world wide web has to offer. Buckle up this is going to be a true ride!